oneguysview's blog

So here I am, minding my own business watching a taped show from Sunday when the Queen o' the House says, "my sister wants you to look at this and see what you think". This usually is agood time to get small and unnoticed but seein' as how I'm lounged out on the sofa, that trick ain't gonna work so I get up to look at the computer. It seems my wife's nephew has received a conspiracy theory from a certifiable whack job of Karen Lake proportions. It has to do with a self professed blogger claiming that our government has minted a whole new currency for the upcoming uniting of Canada, America and Mexico. Also turns out  it's a hoax but it seems the lunatic fringe only knows how to receive crank e-mail not investigate it.

For nearly two years we heard how one or the other candidate would bring about change if they won the grand prize of the white house. Barack claimed he had "change we can believe in". So far all I see is change back. Here he touted his youth and energy versius McCain's age and stubborness. But what happened? Now we have the newest administration looking to be populated from the ranks of the tired old hacks turned out from the Clinton years.

The biggest concern of course is the potential appointment of Hillary Clinton to Secretary of State. What is this man thinking? I just don't get it. She is the most polarizing person in politics today. She is also a constant liar. All her BS regarding wanting to be a senator from New York was nothing more than a platform for higher office. She has no conscience. The people of New York deserve better but they did fall for her snake oil salesmanship. So a lot of the problems they brought on themselves.

Now here, my fine red blooded American brothers is an idea whose time has come. Here is the perfect blend of sports and fashion guaranteed to bring men and women together in appreciation of one another's best attributes. I think the BoCC should look into this and raise our tax base with non polluting industry.

http://www.2news.tv/news/local/30539709.html?video=pop&t=a

I do have the best of friends who continue to amuse me and now you.

 CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer.

CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.

BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.

VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.

Solo, we support the Cubs in their relenteless hundred year search for a world series title. I have just discovered why they are jinxed, Somebody must take a stand.  Check out this story.

http://www.pjstar.com/sports/x1929475655/Curses-Goat-left-at-the-gate

I don't write about politics but I do follow them. I have been going back and forth as to who the best choice might be. Who would best agree with how I see things. From my view I have to say neither of these candidates measure up. I originally thought McCain would be good simply based on  his past. He is a man of his word, he can be counted on to fight a good fight. Anybody tough enough to survive the murderous thugs in Viet Nam has a toughness very few in our country today can match. Then came the disastrous attempt to legalize a bunch of lawbreaking illegal aliens. It had to be hammered home to him that he was on the wrong side of that issue. This was the beginning of my doubts. I feel he is too stubborn to be allowed his lead in some issues.

John was in the fertilized egg business.      He had several hundred young layers

I have just received my first ever piece o' hate mail. Can you believe it? I read a lot about this supposed fair tax pushed by a guy named Boortz. I did read the review here on the blogs and did come to believe that the people who love this idea are very uncompromising and at times down right hateful. They don't believe in dialogue. Well, just for fun I submitted an anti Fair Tax blurb to the T-U last week. I had read that the T-U refuses to print opposing views on the subject but tried anyway. Lo and behold, it got published,. Go figure.

Now we get to flash forward to today. Some hate monger named John D. Williams actually took the time to write me a hate letter telling me I am "ignorant and functionally incompetent" because I don't think the way the fair tax people do. Can you believe this nerve? According to the hate letter, Neal Boortz wrote this in his book, Somebody's Got to Say It. (Never heard of it. Must be a real barn burner of a book.) Well, Mr. Williams, go to hell. I now fully believe that you and your kind are sick in the head and I want the entire community to know what I think of you. And to quote a nobody like this Neal Boortz? That's who you look up to to lead you? Talk about "functionally incompetent". If you need to be led around by thenose from a blabber mouth you are a very poor excuse for a man. Go to hell, FAST!

Well, I am into a second week of bachelorhood. Here are a list tips my lovely bride should have given to me.

Finally, a way to know what to pitch and what to save!

THE GAG TEST
Anything that makes you gag is spoiled (except for leftovers from what you cooked for yourself last night).

EGGS
When something starts pecking its way out of the shell, the egg is probably past its prime.

DAIRY PRODUCTS
Milk is spoiled when it starts to look like yogurt. Yogurt is spoiled when it starts to look like cottage cheese. Cottage cheese is spoiled when it starts to look like regular cheese. Regular cheese is nothing but spoiled milk anyway and can't get any more spoiled than it is already. Cheddar cheese is spoiled when you think it is blue cheese but you realize you've never purchased that kind.

MAYONNAISE
If it makes you violently ill after you eat it, the mayonnaise is spoiled.

FROZEN FOODS
Frozen foods that have become an integral part of the defrosting problem in your freezer compartment will probably be spoiled - (or wrecked anyway) by the time you pry them out with a kitchen knife.

EXPIRATION DATES
This is NOT a marketing ploy to encourage you to throw away perfectly good food so that you'll spend more on groceries. Perhaps you'd benefit by having a calender in your kitchen.

MEAT
If opening the refrigerator door causes stray animals from a three-block radius to congregate outside your house, the meat is spoiled.

BREAD
Sesame seeds and Poppy seeds are the only officially acceptable "spots" that should be seen on the surface of any loaf of bread. Fuzzy and hairy looking white or green growth areas are a good indication that your bread has turned into a pharmaceutical laboratory experiment.

FLOUR
Flour is spoiled when it wiggles.

SALT
It never spoils.

CEREAL
It is generally a good rule of thumb that cereal should be discarded when it is two years or longer beyond the expiration date.

LETTUCE
Bibb lettuce is spoiled when you can't get it off the bottom of the vegetable crisper without Comet. Romaine lettuce is spoiled when it turns liquid.

CANNED GOODS
Any canned goods that have become the size or shape of a softball should be disposed of. Carefully.

CARROTS
A carrot that you can tie a clove hitch in is not fresh.

RAISINS
Raisins should not be harder than your teeth.

POTATOES
Fresh potatoes do not have roots, branches, or dense, leafy undergrowth.

CHIP DIP
If you can take it out of its container and bounce it on the floor, it has gone bad.

EMPTY CONTAINERS
Putting empty containers back into the refrigerator is an old trick, but it only works if you live with someone or have a maid.

UNMARKED ITEMS
You know it is well beyond prime when you're tempted to discard the Tupperware along with the food. Generally speaking, Tupperware containers should not burp when you open them.

GENERAL RULE OF THUMB
Most food cannot be kept longer than the average life span of a hamster. Keep a hamster in or nearby your refrigerator to gauge this.

DEMOCRAT, REPUBLICAN OR SOUTHERNER!

Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Here is a little test that will help you decide.

The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You’re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.
Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner,
locks eyes with you, screams obscenities,
praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you.

You are carrying a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?