OGV- This Bud's For You!

Thanks for your post, now here's a really good one I got recently:

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.
 
At a recent computer expo, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, 'If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.'

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:
 
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:
 
   1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash........  Twice a day.
 
   2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you  would have to buy a new car.
 
   3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the  side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
 
   4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
 
   5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.
 
   6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single 'This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation' warning light.
 
   7. The airbag system would ask 'Are you sure?' before deploying.
 
   8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
 
   9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
 
   10. You'd have to press the 'Start' button to turn the engine off. 




Submitted by oneguysview on Wed, 08/13/2008 - 7:45am.

Ain't technology grand? Since new cars are run by computers this is so much scarier.




Submitted by finder on Wed, 08/13/2008 - 11:52am.

If you're going to start passing out Bud you might have to start learning a second language. Didn't they just get bought out by a foreign company?

Sounds like our 46.5 miles of bad tollway. Maybe they'll put the 'You just got screwed' signs up in something other than English hoping people won't notice right away.

Mike Heemer




Submitted by clarity on Wed, 08/13/2008 - 2:13pm.

I hadn't heard. I don't drink beer. It was the only sound bite I could think of that seemed to fit the bill. 

From what I understand, foreign beer is better anyway. Or lager or ale or whatever they call it. Personally, I prefer a nice smooth merlot....




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